Am disturbed by the perceptions of most of the women I have come across on the topic of boyfriend. So to start it off, I will try and explain who a boyfriend is, his roles and most importantly why he choose you. Men in my opinion, choose women that they want,women that they like their character, women of substance. Some may chase and even get women who aren't necessarily upright in morals and character but very rarely do they settle with them.
There are many many books on relationships and most targeting women on how to either find, keep or get back a man. According to the urban dictionary, a boyfriend is a great guy who make you feel good bout yourself... a protector, and your best friend. Another dictionary describes him as a male friend with whom a person is romantically or sexually involved; sweetheart or lover.Oxford describes him as a person’s regular male companion with whom they have a romantic or sexual relationship.
My definition is the same as the urban dictionary. Am not an English language expert, no Sir, but I do believe he is meant to be a friend. Now, my main worry comes in when we ladies expect our men to me a mix of angel, our dads, lover and friend. As an angel, he knows what you need before you even ask and agrees with you on everything, as a dad he protects you and provides for you, as a lover he has romantic ties with you and as a friend he is there to hold you and help you get through happy and trying times. If you find, him please please call me, I need to meet him.
Boyfriends are many times mistaken as such, all rounders. Some make the effort to be what we expect, some don't and other can't understand what we want exactly. There are no written roles of boyfriends, at least none that I have heard of, but one writer summarizes them to 3 things; to protect, provide and proclaim his love for you. Most do that, and when we stop appreciating that ladies, we begin to nag, like really nag.
Let me explain what I mean. I have a guy friend who I love dearly, not a boyfriend, and he recently lost his job. He worked hard to find a new one and even started a small side business to try and support his family. But No! he had a "nagger", he had a girlfriend, steady one I thought, but this lady acted really shady. Since she was the one working now, she started making some stupid demands, like he has to be home when she gets back from work, he has to clean the house and the baby, he has to have his friends come pick him from his house as she doesn't trust his whereabouts and the worst of them all, he has no life without her. This guy friend complied with her demands, to me that's insanity. About a month later, he got a job and she started "submitting". Acting all goody goody and lovey lovey with him. That's a nagging girl. Ooh he left her. I would to.
We, those who don't know, need to learn to support our men as the troubles are never permanent especially when you see an effort to change his situation. I have seen this happen. A wife supporting her man, family and herself for years when her husband lost his job, his business and savings, and helped him get back up.It happens and can happen. You don't know what tomorrow holds and the trial times for men is when they have everything and women, our trial times is when our men have nothing. We need to love them and not judge them, stop making some demands that we also can't do or believe one asked for them, trust them as you said yes to him for a reason, ask for what we want clearly not giving hints obvious to us and oblivious to them, we need to stop thinking we can change them once we start dating or marry, and always remember the first time you were in love with him and remember to ALWAYS APPRECIATE THEM.
Do I have a boyfriend? Yes. Do I think he is annoying? At times. Do I love him? Yes, Will I support him when things get rough? I plan to.
Let's make a toast to all the boyfriends all over the world doing the right thing, a toast to the women besides them doing the right thing and Most importantly to those women who will start to appreciate their men for doing the right thing
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